Summer Frights High

What does a gay horse say?

HEEEEEYY!!!!

Whats up blog fans!? I got a sizzling, semi-spontaneous blog fo yo asses!
Yes im still in Australia, yes im still in Darwin, working, in a school... sweating my arse off... But theres been a FEW small changes and things going on. Plus I aint really spoken to people at home too much, so read this for an update. Then when we talk I dont have to repeat the same shiz a thousand times, leaving more time to talk about YOU!
So tighten your belt! Coz if those shorts aint TIGHT, they'll blow right off like DY-NO-MITE!

So basically, im writing this from my cozy little cabin at the moment. Its getting dark, and im about to shower and go to bed... No big deal right? No, EXCEPT, tomorrow Bulldozer Billy is coming along and crushing our home TO THA GROUND!! :-0 I know, right! Shocking! All the kids at the school have broken up now for their Christmas holidays. Whilst they're away the schools getting a major make-over. Its like the schools going into surgery, and our home is the big ugly hooked nose that needs removing the most. So tonight will be our last sleep here. Bit of a shame, as we've just settled in and made it our home.... But thats not even the worst thing about it blog fans! Once our home is turned to dust, we're being moved to the EEC building. I dont even know what EEC stands for. If I had to guess, i'd say "Extremely Eerie Crap!" Because that building is SCARY! When I lock it up at night, its like House On Haunted Hill. Which is pretty fitting, as apparently it used to be a hospital! Great... I've heard stories about things being moved in there, over night, once its been locked up. I've spoken to a girl who said she was listening to the radio in there, and several witnesses saw the volume dial turn down right in front of their eyes. So SLEEPING there, on the 3rd floor, at night, alone on campus should be... ginteresting... Ive been sleeping with a big knife and baseball bat near me in this cabin... but i dont think thats gonna help me against a bloody rapist poltergeist :-(

OTHERWISE the job is going really well! The staff are all really nice, Cat and I are saving well, so cant complain... The teachers sometimes cook us food for lunch, or buy us ciders for just helping and doing our jobs. Its weird, but great haha... On top of that, 80% of the teachers look like super models. That just wouldnt happen in a British school. The Australian kids just dont know how good they got it!... I was invited to the Christmas party on Friday. We had after work drinks, and after 4 ciders, and 4 beers, I was well up for it. Especially considering I lost about 19 gallons of sweat at work just before that... It was really last minute though, and I was texting all the other backpackers to come with me, but no one did. Didnt really wanna tag along with none of the other backpackers with me, like a weird lonely loser. So I just stumbled around the school, drunk, locking all the gates... Then I passed out at 7:30... Epic fail...

We have no plans for Christmas or NYE yet... Its probably gonna suck. Its our 3rd Christmas away from home. The 1st one we flew from Costa Rica to Peru on Christmas day. So that was pretty shit. Dry arse airplane meals for Christmas dinner lol. Last year in Sydney was good. But I got a feeling we got another shit one in store for us this year. We've got some dates in mind for our next stages now though. Probably gonna leave the school on the 27th of March. Drive to Uluru on a road trip, then leave Australia (finally) to The Philippines on April 7th.  So its all getting pretty close! I've given myself a couple of projects some of you might be interested in. Im gonna start to make slideshows of our travels, and uploading them to YouTube. Its a little hobby of mine, but its also a nicer, easier way for people to look at what we've done, step by step. The slideshows will take a while to do, but im also sporadically uploading some random travel videos... If you search YouTube for "RobCat Travel" you might find it... I'll try to get a URL for our page or something later.

So keep your shorts tight for all of that!

Merry Christmas if I dont speak to you before that...
Make it a blogtastic one ;-)

Until then.... Zoooooooooooooooop!! x

Darwin: Blogtastic Update

Im sitting on my couch, in Darwin, fan on, watching “The Perks Of Being A Wallflower” and writing this spontaneous blog... WELCOME BACK BLOG FANS! :D This is a little different... I’ve made no notes, and theres no major trips to tell of... This is just a little catch up, coz shiz happens, and I haven’t really told everyone whats been going on much... The blogs are back in town, the blogs are back in town! ;)

The last update I wrote, I think Cat was just starting her job at Britz campers. This job is now coming to the end of its contract, and the company is closing up for the “wet season”. I was getting odd labouring jobs, sweating my arse off, making the odd buck or two... I took a job on where I was helping sand, paint, and restore boats. It was fun at first, but then the boat went out on the water, and I ended up spending my days moving heavy shit around the dusty yard, in the blazing heat, and sweeping... Lots and lots of sweeping. On top of that, my hours were getting cut, so my shit wage, was getting even shitter... I was trying to get more work at this point but I was failing. I came really really close to getting 2 jobs at graphics companies, but they did a U-turn on me as soon as they found out I wasn’t a permanent resident here. It was starting to piss me off. Lots of guys from all over the world are here, making lots of money, in good jobs that they’re trained in, and I was always bottom of the barrel. Darwin revolves around construction work. I actually wrote a poem / rap about it :p I was gonna do my first “vlog” (video blog) performing it, but luckily my fortunes changed for the better before I had the chance to... I had things like...

 

At first Brits came here raping lands
Now we come here making grands
On the beaches, lay in sand
No more need for faking tans.

And

References – A handful

Experiences – Ample
I’m job hunting all the time, and my mind is getting tangled

 

Anyway... Things chopped and changed a lot. I quit my boat job, and started work for a partition company. Helping build walls and ceilings, in homes and offices. It was OK. There was other backpackers there, so I didn’t feel like the little, lonely, foreign runt anymore. The guys here were funny. A French guy and an Argentinean make funny jokes about the bosses and Aussies. They do impressions of Australians having sex: “Ahh, thats good mate!” “Fucking good mate!” lol... We have bosses that are Greek and pretty fucking miserable. Also, there’s Australian tradies that work on the more technical stuff. Some are really cool, but some have that same “stupid backpackers” attitude, because some guys don’t speak fluent English, and a lot of us don’t have experience in this kind of work. So they walk around like their shit don’t stink, looking down on us in the same way the bosses do. Theyre over-paid, and under-educated pricks though. All they do it measure and cut things... Cat took on part-time evening work at a pizza place :) On her first day she brought me back a free one she made, and it was really nice...

But this is where the game changer kicked in... Cat was at her Britz job one day, and she answered the phone to a friendly lady. They got chatting, and it turned out that this woman worked at a school that often hired backpackers. She said she hates how most of us are mistreated here, and if Cat ever needed a job, she was welcome to come along. After swapping contact details and asking more questions, we found out we could BOTH work there, LIVE there, RENT FREE, and get paid a GOOD wage. GAME CHANGER! THATS why I scrapped my vlog, inspired by stress and negativity :p Maybe I should write a happy poem :D

So, this is whats going down - Today I worked my last day at this partition company (they don’t know it yet), and tomorrow, we’re moving out of our Darwin home, to our NEW Darwin home, in the middle of a SCHOOL! :o Cat will do general work around the grounds , and I will be the bloody CARETAKER. King of the school! Haha... So I should be starting that on Monday morning, and start saving a BOMB! Cat will be moving in with me, and starting work after her Britz job finishes in a week or so.  It will be sad to move out of this place, as I really do like it. This new place is smaller, older, without a pool, and its in the middle of a school, further from the city. But to be fair, we came to Darwin to work and save money - nothing else. So this is what we’re doing.

Not much else to say really... Every day I have off I research travel routes, things to do, visas, and everything for travelling Asia. Got a rough route planned. Philippines, Japan, Taiwan, China, Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, Singapore, Sri Lanka, India, THEN home. Want to see Uluru, in the centre of Australia before we leave here though. But to be honest, im just really excited to leave Aus and start travelling again really. As you might be able to tell, struggling to work here, and being degraded, and stressed has been a challenge. We could come home to work and save for Asia. Cat was close to doing that at one point. But I told her to stick to our decision to stay here and graft. Cat agrees after a bit of encouragement :p I’ve missed some big events at home lately. My brother got engaged and had a big party with all our friends and family. Someone very close to me came out of prison, and id like to see him. My dog got hit by a car... and I heard this morning that my nan passed away... So her funeral will be another big thing ive been away for. Most people I speak to encourage me to stay away as long as possible though. “Keep living the dream!” Even if it aint exactly pretty right now :p At least we got good luck with the new jobby though! Time to stack that cheeeeese!! Money, money, money baaaagggsssss!

 

PEACE OUT ,YO! X

(and keep them tight)

;)

UK vs AUS

DUH DUH DUUHHH!!! We’re going to war bog fans! Now for all my British blog fans at home, I know you know AT LEAST 1 or 2 facebook contacts, in Australia, posting annoyingly smug statuses about beaches, sun and fun. Selfies, screen shots of weather forecasts, and generally touching themselves with gloating excitement...  BUT should you believe the hype!? What – is – the - deal!? Well, keep your shorts tight, coz im breaking shit down like a b-boy on a sugar rush...

 

 

FOOTBALL vs “FOOTBALL”

One of the main tings I miss about the UK is the football. Real football... If Australia wants to be taken seriously, they should really sort this shit out.  The AFL (Aussie Football League) is NOT football. If ANYTHING its a gay version of Rugby. Yeah, that’s right, I said it – Gay Rugby!... I don’t know what they were thinking when they created this game. Its basically Rugby but the pass the ball weird, and wear the TIGHTEST batty rider hot pants. I swear these guys must all be impotent or something. Its aggressive, I give them that, but naaahhh... Its no Premier League... Plus all their teams are called things like “The Storm!” and “The Rabbitohs!” The national football team is called the “SOCCEROOS” and the national basketball team is called the “BOOMERS” lol def gay though...

VERDICT – UK

 

 

DOGS vs DINGOS

Most Brits talk about this when coming to Aus. DANGEROUS ANIMALS... Australia has snakes that can kill you, spiders that can kill you, crocodiles that can kill you, sharks, cassowaries, dingos, kangaroos, even the bloody koalas can give you an STI! So think twice if you decide to bum one of them, blog fans... But seriously, what do we have in the UK? Pigeons and rats?... That’s about it when it comes to wild animals really. Oh, and maybe the odd fox or two. I’ve had a few close encounters with nasties in my time here. But to be honest, I’m still alive, so far, and at least the wildlife here is a little more interesting...

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

CHAVS vs BOGANS

I don’t know what the social definition for a chav, or a bogan really is. But from what I can tell, a bogan is pretty much the same as a chav. Suppose Jeremy Kyle is a good reference point... I think maybe chavs are a bit more urban and scummy - whereas bogans are usually dirty little rednecks with missing teeth... Dunno, maybe I’m a chav? Suppose it depends on how damning the chav / bogan labelling is really... Anyway... I hate rednecks, so...

VERDICT – UK

 

 

 

LAMBRINI vs GOON

OMG goon!! Gooooon!!! Ok, let me compose myself. I was never really a Lambrini drinker in the UK. For anyone who doesn’t know, Lambrini is a cheap wine in the UK, famous for 14 year old girls drinking it in parks. Which is pretty much what goon is for Aussies... Or maybe thats Passion Pop? I love a bit of P.O.P too, but lets focus on the goon for now :) It comes in 4ltr bags, and costs $12 on average. Its so cheap, that I think they cant legally label it as “wine”. Its called FRUITY LEXIA. Some people hate goon, and have bad reactions to it. But after a while - a beautiful thing. So many fun times and memories have been created, and so many brain cells destroyed :) Without it, id have a lot fewer friends in Aus, trust me... It brings a whole new meaning to “fun bags”! Ah, goon. I will miss goon... Good ol goon... Ah... Goon :D xxx

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

BOOZE vs GROG

As we’re on the subject of alcohol - let’s compare the rest. Goon aside, drinking in the UK is a lot better for many reasons. One of the main reasons is because of a dirty little word in Aus: “RSA”. Responsible Service of Alcohol. Its the biggest pile of shit ever. It basically means you’re supposed to go out to clubs, and dance, and talk... But you can’t get DRUNK, oh nooo! The drinking laws in Australia are PATHETIC! Bouncers won’t let you in clubs for being tipsy, you can get removed from clubs for ANYTHING, you can’t have doubles after midnight, no shots after midnight, shots are expensive and no offers are allowed... it sucks!! Without goon, I don’t know what they’ll do! So what are you supposed to do? Buy a beer and have a reasonable, sober conversation with my peers? Psst, Ich don’t think so blog fans. Goon and house parties is the way forward. Goon all night long please :D

VERDICT – UK

 

 

PRIMARK vs K-MART

Everyone loves a store that uses child labour to bring us cheap goodies! :) What’s the major difference? Well, K-Mart is a lot more like the American Wall-Mart. It has anything you can think of – from clothes, to kitchenware, to sports stuff, electronics. Primark is just a chaotic heap of shit really. You can only get clothes there, and shopping there usually feels like you’re doing grocery shopping at a manic New Delhi, Sunday market...

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

SARAHS vs SHEILAS

Time for me to get even more shallower... Which is better? Well, let’s just say the weather aint the ONLY hot thing in Australia blog fans! ;) Hell yeeeaa!... I mean, they probably get a bit of help from the tans, outdoor jogging, and beach lifestyles... Some of the Aussie girls have a rep for being a bit more stuck up though. Some come across as pouty little bitches. But still... Tamarama! ;)

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

BRONSON vs CHOPPER

I really don’t know. But it would be interesting... Dont know if im talking about the films, the people, or who would win in a fight... Dont even know why im typing about it... Just don’t know blog fans...

VERDICT – ???

 

 

 

CHRISTMAS vs “CHRISTMAS”

I’m approaching my 2^nd Christmas in Aus, and it just aint the sames... Its approaching the end of September now, so in the UK, Christmas is probably in full swing. Which is kind of lame to be honest... Coz after our “summer”, there aint much more to look forward to. So by September, Christmas is in the shops, in the magazines, on the TV, in the adverts. Its everywhere. Which is shit... But when it finally comes around, we do it properly. Cold weather, knitted scarfs, Christmas jumpers, stockings, and a big roast. Thats what Christmas is all about!! None of that shrimp on the barbie bullshit!... Plus, they call Christmas crackers, “Bon-Bon’s”... Yeah, I know....

VERDICT – UK

 

 

 

EAST ENDERS vs NEIGHBOURS

I hate both... All soaps suck arse... But this aint about them two. It’s about TV in general. A lot of Brits have said to me “Australian TV is shit, init”. I suppose it depends on what you mean. I actually like Australian TV. They have a lot of good programs on, and every night there’s a decent movie or 2 to watch. But if you’re talking about Australian TV made by AUSTRALIANS, then yeah... Its pretty shit. Most of the stuff they play is British and American anyway. But all their game shows are just lame imitations, and the acting in their soaps is TERRIBLE! So I would actually say EastEnders wins...Plus, some of their regional adverts OMG... They make me cry with embarrassment...

VERDICT – UK

 

 

BOURNEMOUTH vs BONDI

Rhetorical question? A lot of Aussies say they don’t like Bondi. They think its over-crowded, and over hyped compared to other beaches they have. Which is true... But they obviously haven’t seen Bournemouth on a sunny day, have they... I think we usually match the entire Aussie population on that beach during our one week of summer. Spoilt bastards...

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

£ vs $

The pound is powerful, and is probably the best currency to travel with. But working in Australia, is so much more of a better deal than home. They get paid so much more, and although people say “Australia’s expensive”. It really isn’t, for most things. There’s always jobs available here too. I came to this country as a half way point of my travels, to save money and continue my travels. You can land jobs here with little to no experience or qualifications, and earn more than someone at home with a university degree. If you have a skill or trade, you could come here, and literally rape!

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

PISS OFF vs PEEEEEZ ORFFF

We def have cooler accents blog fans ;) We say “yog-urt” They say “yo-gurt”. We say “pasta” they say “parrrsta”. We say “Christmas crackers” they say.... “BONBONS!” ARRGHH!! Their accents can be a bit cringe. It doesn’t vary too much like ours either. Its either Aussie, or Bogan hillbilly. My argument is - we speak the correct way, as ENGLISH is from ENGLAND... :D Ha!!

VERDICT – UK

 

 

MARMITE & PENGUINS vs VEGEMITE & TIMTAMS

If you don’t know what Marmite and Penguins are, or Vegemite and Timtams. They’re BASICALLY the same thing. I don’t overly care too much about any of these products. Regardless to what the advert says – I don’t love OR hate Marmite. But I can be partial to it on a bit of toast now and then. I haven’t tried Vegemite yet. But ive smelt it, and it smells just like Marmite, mixed with baby diarrhea :/ Timtams are good though! I used to think they were a bit over hyped. But then i was introduced to the caramel, peanut butter, and white chocolate ones. Mmm...  Marmite beats Vegemite – Timtams beat Penguins...

VERDICT – Draw

 

 

HYDE PARK vs “HYDE PARK”

Obviously our Hyde Park in London, is the original - and Sydney are just faking the funk... But i cant judge them on that... In general, most Australian cities have lots of parks, and gardens, and they’re all really nice. One of the best things about living in Sydney was you could always just go to the park, or botanical gardens and just chill there... The sun it out, the grass is green, and you can get nice views, and you can do some bird watching (In both senses of the word). And you can bring GOON!! I’ve done about 6000 BBQs in various parks around Australia. I will miss them times when im back in the UKs greyness.

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

RITA ORA vs IGGY AZALEA

Yeah, I know ive probably just picked out the worst possible names to make a comparison on music. But which country has the best music scene? Rhetorical question? Another thing I miss about living in London, is the buzzing music scene. Whether it was a local or overseas artist, I could literally see someone I liked every week. I do love finding new music, and I have found a few pretty awesome artists from Australia... But to be honest, the list of amazing artists from the UK, just go on and on and on...

VERDICT – UK

 

 

 

TUBE vs TRAM

This aint a direct comparison of Londons tube, to Melbournes Tram. But a comparison of transport in general. Local transport in most of Australia sucks pretty bad. In a lot of cities the service has been irregular, slow, dated, and they use stupid systems. But then, you can look at the UK, and I haven’t seen hardly any of my homeland. This is mostly down to the ridiculous prices for trains and petrol, and all the bloody road works and traffic that holds people back from travelling it. I could probably fly from Adelaide to Darwin for cheaper than a train from London to Newcastle. But on the other hand, I cant get home from the centre of Darwin because buses stop running at 9:30pm. What the hell is that about?...

VERDICT – Draw

 

 

 

GRUB vs TUCKER

I spoke about food already, but a lot of people like to yap their opinions about it. I don’t see the big deal... Find something you like and shove it down your throat! The GENERAL opinion is... Our Nandos is better, their Subways is better. Their McDonalds is cheaper, their Burger King is called Hungry Jacks. Our chicken is cheaper, their beef is cheaper. Their fruit is expensive, but eating out is cheap. Our Indian is better, their Chinese beats ours... Blah blah blah blah!!... Nearly every Brit ive met has told me what food they miss from home. Ironically Britain has a reputation for having shit food. To be honest, I got the feeling ill be missing more food ive had out here, then I do from home now. Mainly because, eating out IS cheap! I will miss $1 hot dogs, $5 pizzas, $10 steak and mash, and 30cent Ice creams from McDonalds. Yeah, 30cent... Thats like, 17p. Its a joke... When you combine that with all the tasty Asian food they do round here, you can shove that “I miss Yorkshire puddings” attitude up your arse!

VERDICT – AUS

 

 

 

JAMES BOND vs CROCODILE DUNDEE

Just thought this category up... James Bond has crazy gadgets, drives flash cars, shags hot bitches, and saves the world... What does Crocodile Dundee actually do? Sharpen knifes and fingers crocodiles bumholes!? HA!...

VERDICT – UK

 

 

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS vs POLITICAL RESPECTLESS

Ooooh!! Touchy subject blog fans... Let me start off by saying race issues on Australia seem to be a big topic amongst backpackers. Im just gonna speak my opinion on it... To say Australia is a racist country, is a racist remark... So people saying that obviously aint very open minded, and don’t know how racial profiling actually works. What I CAN say though, is the UK seems to be a very “P.C”, and Australia is not. They’re overly patriotic, and patriotism is frowned upon back home. This is not about individual people, but just in general... Some things can be quite a shock compared to what im used to. This is not just racial, sexist, or religious issues. But even things like swearing and watershed on TV, is a lot more lax here. I think at the end of the day, all countries roughly have an equal amount racists and bigots - obviously. The main difference is when someone shouts something like “I fucking hate jews!” ..In Australia people are like “Hmm, fair enough” Whilst in the UK, you’ve probably already been decapitated... I agree with freedom of speech, and I feel our country is a bit overly poofy (not being homophobic) about hurting peoples feelings. Although we have some stupid, NF, skinhead, dickheads in the UK – I’ve witnessed too many uncomfortable moments in Australia, that makes me proud to be from an area of the world that generally wouldn’t accept it those types of attitudes... But thats probably just because im a “Bloody pommy c*#t” :p

VERDICT – UK

 

 

 

LONDON vs SYDNEY

Ooooh! THE BIG ONE! (thats what she said) How could I do such a thing!? I think ive spent a total of about 8 months in Sydney all together. I know it like the back of my hand - and ironically... probably better than London!! :o Its true... Living in the city, and Bondi, working there, drinking there. Ive done nearly every single tourist attraction, ate at nearly every budget restaurant, and drank in nearly every bar. I cant say the same about London... To start off, Sydney is a lot smaller than London. You can walk around the CBD in half a day, and see all the sights. As a tour guide I wouldn’t know where to start in London! It’s not really walkable. London is quite spread out, and there’s a lot of hidden gems that I’ll never know about. I suppose its all about the pros and cons... Sydney has the beaches, the weather, the chilled vibe, the parks, the girls... I like the fact you can do everything by walking, or just a bus or two, and you don’t need to spend much money. London has the culture, the history, the atmosphere, the cool vibe, and it just feels like home... We might not have the weather and beaches, but we have loads of museums, old architecture, cool bars and pubs, and the whole city is just very iconic. If I had to come down to it – I would say Sydney is slightly better in the day, London is better at night... But again... Swings and roundabouts...

VERDICT – Draw

 

 

 

Summary:

So, what have we learnt blog fans? Where does this leave us? Well, I guess you can never really give a fair comparison on 2 countries. Its easy for someone travelling to go “Oh, Brazil is amazing! New Zealand is beautiful!” But until you’ve actually worked, played and lived in that country for a considerable amount of time, you cant judge at all. I’ve been here in Aus a year and a half now. I’ve worked and paid bills. I’ve come across arse-hole bosses, and met really nice locals. So ive got a small taster of what it might be like to be an Australian, living and working here. But its still not a fair comparison. For a start, I come from Harrow, in England... In Australia, most of my time I’ve lived at Bondi beach. Therefore my vision on each countries reality is probably clouded. I’m sure there’s some guys living a very dull life in the outskirts of Sydney, that could come to London, stay in Kensington a couple weeks, and think we all live like the royal family. Also, I’ve seen quite a bit of Australia now, but aint really seen f*ck all of England. So every time I speak about home, its from a Harrow point of view. I know NOTHING about England lol.

Anyway – The big question is, can I / will I ever live in Australia? Well, like I said, I came here as a half way point of my adventure. Its just a stepping stone to completing my bucket list. To stay in Aus, you really need to be sponsored by a company to continue working here. Its never really been a realistic possibility for me, so I never thought about it. But WOULD I, if I COULD??... Probably... NOT :)

Its just not where my heart and soul lies... Australia would be a great place to live, and I think the Australian people are really lucky here. IF I was one of these guys that was happy to come here, settle down, get a career, start a family, then yeah... This would be a great opportunity for people like that. That just aint me though... I came here as a “backpacker” and I will leave as a backpacker. People come here with the intentions of bettering their life, and I respect that. But to me, all these things in Australia will not make me happy. I left the UK through lack of satisfaction, and until ive finished my planned route around the world, I will never be satisfied lol. I don’t feel I belong here either. Im not a surfer, im not a fisherman, im not a farmer, and I don’t hunt animals or play gay rugby...  So where does that leave me? All jokes aside, Australia does feel cut off from the rest of the world. One guy said to me he feels Australia doesn’t feel like real life. It feels like a pop-up country for backpackers to roam around. The best thing about living in London is it feels like earth has been shrunk into our little city, and everything exists there for us. So unfortunately that time will come where I will have to say bye to the sunshine, bye to the hot girls in bikinis, buy to goon, bye to Sydney, bye to Australia... I will be coming home better than ever!! :D

 

(You might just have to wait a while)

;)

 

Welcome To Darwin

Errm.. May I have one Hazelnut Macchiato, and a big dollop of BLOGBERRY TART!!

 
Oh, hey Blog fans... Wasn’t expecting you on an idol Tuesday afternoon....
But as you’re ALREADY HERE, you might as well gander at the GOOSE!
This is my intro to our first week in Darwin... Whats going on, whats going on...
 
Landed from Bali on a brisk Saturday morning... It was bleak, but much angst was in the air... (lol) We didn’t sleep much on the plane. It departed at 1am, 2-3hr flight, then a cab to our new Darwin home. The cab cost twenty-something dollars... Just a couple of hours before that, we could of bought a personal daily chauffer for that price! Anyway, we were at our new home, safe, and it wasn’t a hostel... Moving up in the world blog fans ;) We walked into town on the Sunday. The “city” is DEAD! Patrick Swayze! Its a TINY city, with a couple roads, shops, restaurants, bars and hostel. Its literally built for backpackers to come here and work. They say its the “capital of the Northern Territory”.. PAH!! The only sign of civilization was in the bars. “Sundays Sessions” are a big thing here. Everyone seemed pretty smashed for an afternoon. All backpackers – mostly British and Irish... It felt a bit like ive just walked on the TOWIE set or something... Not really my type of scene. But we got a cider, walked round, and headed home...
 
We hit the job hunt ting HARD from then on. I was actually pretty happy in Darwin. I really liked our place, our landlords were really cool, and I was just happy to chill out here and work for a few months. Cat didn’t seem to be in the same mood. She was panicking about getting work, from day 2.. Literally... This is what i gotta deal with... She then started huffing about being a bit far from the city, not wanting to be around the house, and not meeting new people... I know what you’re thinking... “Why does she need new friends, when she has Robbie G?” I know blog fans. Bitches – be – trippppiiinnngggg.... I was happy to be around the house, chill by the pool with my music on, job hunt etc... (Bare in mind, this is day 2 or 3) I also gave us a few things to do around the house. We moved beds around, put up a world map, and some family photos... bought a few pots and pans... Just making the place feel a bit more like home really. It was nice! We signed up to “The Job Shack” quite quickly. Cost us $70, but I got to admit – job hunting online was already getting a bit depressing. Im not really qualified for anything, or employable for much here. Then i gotta apply for jobs that have been seen by 100 different people. Sucks donkey balls man... So yeah, Job Shack seemed a good idea. With the service they print off CV’s for free too. Cat got 3 or 4 printed, handed a couple out, then... 2 phone calls... She literally got calls back within a hour or 2...
She took a trial for the first bar that rang. She almost instantly regretted it. I told her she didn’t have to take it, but like I said (whisper) “bitches be tripping”... She seemed to be happy with the pay and the tips. But she was working from 9 to 5... Not the Dolly Parton type of 9 to 5, but the naughtier side of 9 to 5... 9PM to 5AM... And Cat aint the type of person that can just chill out in the day and sleep. So she was coming in at 6am, waking up at 9am, and feeling aggravated... tripping... I also got work. Mine was through the Job Shack. Got a couple shifts on an exhibition site, just taking down all the stands and loading them on trucks etc. Bit sad, coz i used to print and design these types of stands, but oh well... Im prob getting paid more to do this anyway... Also got a gardening job at a womans house. She was nice, and had two nice dogs. She made me lunch and drinks. Work was fine, but Darwin is HOT! People keep warning me, saying “You just wait until wet season, when it gets REALLY humid”. Fenton, I don’t wanna know... Really hope to land a full-time job, indoors with air-con to be honest. Id literally... eat baby shit from nappies for work - if it was indoors with air-con. But at this gardening job, it wasn’t too bad. She had a NICE big pool in the garden though. Teasing me! Like a fat kid being tied to a stool, with chocolate cake just out of his tongues reach... I was mostly shovelling, moving stuff, spreading mulch around... It was “E-MULCH-ONAL” ;) At the end of the day she offered me a can of V energy drink. I downed it in two gulps, then shit hit the fan. Just started to feel really faint, and sick. The lady looked at me and said “You look like shit, maybe you should go home” Luckily it was more-or-less leaving time anyway. DEF need air-con... Baby shit anyone??
 
So... This brings us up to the last couple of days. Its been a GAME CHANGER... I joined up with a free local agency, and they got me work straight away. They hooked me up with working on a building site - doing labouring stuff, and I got it for the whole week. Its really good money, and this week should sort me out rent, food, and savings for ASIA!! I did my first shift there today, and felt shit in the heat again :p I just don’t cope with it well – headaches, dizziness, nausea... But oh well... No nappies to eat yet... Cat kept getting “e-mulch-onal” about her job at the bar... but luckily she managed to get herself an interview with Britz campers. The interview went very well, and today, SHE GOT THE JOBBY!! :D So she will be hiring out campervans to tourist from tomorrow! Awesome. She also quit her bar job too... Naturally...
 
So thats it!
 
After Cats premature worries, everything seems to be on the up. I’ll keep looking for this full-time, indoor work... “I’ll have my fingers crosssseddd” (as Freddy Got Fingered would say). Stay tuned for that!
 
Until then.... Keep your shorts tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!!
 
You never know whats gonna happen...
 
Peace out Rabbbiiitttssss
...Zoooooooooop!

BALIstic Birthday Blog

I hear 30 is the new 18 blog fans...

Here’s the proof....

The journey:

So - Goodbye Sydney... Again.  Me and Cat were contemplating getting local busses to the airport, instead of paying $12 each for the shuttle from our hostel. It would have meant us carrying heavy bags to a local bus stop, switching buses, and a lot longer journey. But Cat found a bus ticket on the pavement with 4 extra rides left on it. So we decided to take the bus, and save money. Destiny... J It wasn’t such a bad trek, but it was getting late in the day, and my chronic sinusitis was kicking in. Meaning i was feeling ill and weaker than usual. We had sooo much stuff to carry. We accumulated a lot of crap in Sydney (especially Cat). We had stuff to bring for Natalie, Shona and Rachel too... I even had to wear my steel cap work boots, and hard hat as i couldn’t pack them. When i caught my reflection in the airport, i realised what a knob stain i looked. Looked like I was the only guy coming in fancy dress, as i walked through customs. But it saves me buying it all again in Darwin I guess... LUCKILY we got our baggage checked in OK. We were both a bit over-weight (the bags that is, not us), but she let us through anyway. Cat paid for 20kg, but her bag was about 22kg... I only paid for 15kg because it saved me ONE DOLLAR when booking online. Seems a bit silly now, but my bag was only about 15.7 or something haha... f*ck the system ;) We arrived in Darwin at 1am... As I said in my last blog, we didn’t book a hostel. So we had to sleep on the airport floor until morning. There was actually quite a few people doing the same thing. We looked like a big homeless community. Just with a lot more bags...  We managed to get a tiny bit of sleep. After that, we got a cab to the city centre, and dropped our bags in a hostel for the day. We sat by the lagoon for most of the day. It was BOILING! So much hotter than Sydney... We went for our house viewing at 5pm, and it was REALLY NICE... So tight, and super chill J It was kind of a granny flat, under a family home. It had a big living room / kitchen, bedroom, big bathroom, big fridge, air-con, swimming pool outside, and the family were really really nice. The lady Nicole was really friendly and bubbly. She was like Cat x20... They also had kids running about, and i think it’ll be a nice place to settle when we return. So we put down a deposit, and 2 weeks rent... Just before we left, we met up with our farm friend, Charlotte, had steak, and got a cab back to the airport. Two flights in two nights, and we were stinking. Couldnt wait to get to Bali, shower, and sleep J ...That’ll be so tight...

 

 

Aug 1^st:

BALI!! :D Pretty sure we were raped by the taxi man from the airport... Was expecting people to try it on... naturally... but there was so many people in the pre-paid taxi que, and so many Asian tourists. I couldn’t really ask around for best rates, or a shared taxi. I told Cat to walk outside to look for a cab, and not to talk to all the vultures. But she didn’t listen as she said she was too tired and just wanted to get there. He said “$20 to Kuta. Its an hour or 2 away..” I thought it didn’t sound too bad... but we were literally in the cab for 20mins!! Sneaky MoFo! Oh well... We were here, showered, and in a nice comfy bed J ...NICE!

Woke up in the morning - had rice, noodles, and eggy omelette things for breakfast. Cat must of said “This is a bit strange for breakfast isn’t it” about 62 times... In the morning light, the hotel looked really peaceful, small and quiet... Super chill... NICE! The staff even said “Morning Robert”... I was like “Am i famous or something??” ..Hadnt even introduced myself yet!... We went back to the room to rest a bit more. Plugged in my hard-drive to the TV to watch Idiot Abroad :p We wernt gonna make this a habit though. Was just a busy last couple of days... We went out to walk around the main strip of Kuta and all the laneways and shops. Did a bit of haggling. Managed to get myself a shirt, vest, pair of shorts, and a bucket hat for about $25 J We then randomly bumped in to Emily and Josh (2 friends from our farm). That was a bit strange in the middle of Kuta. A slightly different setting to Mordor, aka Lakeland... We had a beer with them, then met 3 others from the farm that they were travelling with... After the catch up, Cat and I walked back to the hotel, and met up with Rachel and Shonaaa! A couple cocktails later – Marky B, Dacky and Charlotte arrived! J Super badass... We all went out for a curry... Natalie was arriving late, so we didn’t bother waiting... Pssst Natalie.... But we did come back to meet her, and then watched videos and pics off my hard-drive from our time together in Sydney... Totally LOL’ed ourselves to sleep. Was so tight... Totally got ourselves in the mood for another crazy holiday together :D ... Let the Souf holiday be-GIN!!

 

Aug 2^nd:

Got woken up by bells from the local temple, and a bunch of cocks (cockerels)... Was  not so chill... All the girls went off shopping, whilst me, Mark and Dacky had a little look around, and chilled in the pool. The whole day was planned around us getting absolutely smashed at night. And OH MY GOD blog fans, it didn’t disappoint! We had our usual predrink routine of Ring Of Fire, Fire or Ice, Kaos Cards, F*ck The Dealer, etc etc – then we headed out to a bar called AlleyCats. Apparently the “cheapest bar in town”. And for Bali, thats saying something! I went up to get the 1^st round, and got a tray of double vodka redbulls - 150,000IDR... Thats 12 drinks for $15. Or 12 for about 8quid. Fenton... Safe to say we all had 4 or 5 each by the end of it. Maybe more... Not to mention the tequilas etc... We then went to the next bar, and everything got a bit hazy. We were introduced to Shonas friend Mikey, and I had a couple of beers... Apparently.... Then all i remember is thinking to myself “oh my god, im going to die”... I was laying on my bed, and everyone was around me helping me puke off the side of it, into a bin. I chundered EVERYWAAHH... I was in a bad, bad way...

 

Aug 3^rd

Death... Woke up feeling terrible - still being sick, and tingling all over. Now, I know what its like to be absolutely paralytic. Especially with Souf crew. Theyve seen this shiz before blog fans. BUT, this was NOT me being smashed! According to Mark, when he came back, he found me slumped in the shower crying.... lol! I don’t remember being in the bathroom at all, and i probably haven’t cried since i was.... 12? But apparently i was doing it for a good half hour... That shiz cray blog fans. So, i genuinely think, something dodgy happened. Like a spiked drink, or dodgey alcohol or mixers. I didn’t drink anything the other guys didn’t though. Except perhaps tequila... I think... But, I know me... They know me... That wernt normal – at all... Everyone sat round in the morning asking me, and telling me what happened... I also heard Dacky somehow came back, and walked in to the wrong room lol. Classic Shmose. Somehow he went to the wrong room, and even more weirdly – his keys actually opened the door. So we walked into a room, and some big guy was in there, and he got proper mad haha... Anyway. Aug 3^rd was a complete write off for me. We planned to go and see the temple “Tanah Lot”, but i literally couldn’t do anything. I tried sitting by the pool at about 3pm, but i needed to be by the bathroom and air-con... In the evening i thought i might be able to eat, so i headed off to SkyGarden with everyone. SkyGarden is a super club in the middle of Kuta. It does a “all you can eat bbq” for $5!! Its a joke!! The food is awesome as shit, too. On top of that, they do free beer from 5pm to 6pm, and free cocktails from 9 to 10... But i wernt drinking for SHIIIT that day blog fans. I sipped a girly cocktail and wanted to DIE! ...I did order a shisha though, and went home sober J ...Tight...

 

 

Aug 4^th

Jesus Christ Fenton, blog fans! My last day of my 20s :/ That could only mean one thing... Im getting wasted tonight!! I also got to see my PARENTS! :D First time in almost 2 years! Was really weird, yet totally normal to see them. Hung out with them for a bit, super chill, but they needed rest from the big long journey... and i needed to get ON IT! We went back, rested, ate, and got showered and ready early... NICE! I was planning on wearing a Balinese shirt for my big night out, but thats when i got my first of MANY surprises. Cat pulled out 8 plain white Primark tshirts for us all. I think everyone else was surprised too. She also had a packet of colour pens, to graff them up with bday messages, quotes, blah blah blah. At first, I was like.. “Ah, im turning 30 in about 6 hours. Is this really what 30 year olds do?” But after a few drinks, and some mad colouring skills, it turned out to be super badass... I was struggling with predrinks. We played many different games, including a new drinking game present. But I wasn’t as hardcore as usual. I was still dying a bit inside from the “death night”. Every drink was a struggle... It was like the opposite to R Kelly – My mind was telling me yes, but my body was telling me NOOO.... But we got pretty tipsy... I was probably mid-range drunk compared to everyone else. Got out, went AlleyCats, and then it came... Trays upon trays of “double doubles” (those double vodka, and terrible energy drinks again) I was in pain, but i had to do it. ITS MY BIRTHDAY, AND ILL CRY IF I WANT TO.. (In the shower again maybe?) Lol :p Then it got to midnight - BIG celebration, EVERYONE sang for me, was awesome as shit J So tight... Even a bunch of strangers started hugging me and singing for me... We left AlleyCats and headed for SkyGarden. Its basically the biggest club in Kuta. Everyone seemed to be shouting “Follow Robbie G!” “Wheres Marky B and Robbie G!?” I was like... “Who are these people?” Ha best... Paid $10 for entry into SkyGarden, and that came with another free drink. I saw the guy pouring the vodka way up past the half way mark of my drink, and i was like “F-M-L..” lol... But I drank it, and it actually made me feel better! ;) The club was awesome! We danced to live bands, danced next to pole dancers, danced on the roof top... Was probs my fave night of the year so far actually... No one too drunk, no one too sober, no dramas... Just souf ting fun! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROBBIE G! Blup blup! .... Tiiight... J

 

 

Aug 5^th

My ACTUAL Birthday!... Woke up with half of Bali standing around my bed. Felt like the virgin Mary with everyone bearing gifts. All the crew and my parents were there, and i got SPOILT! I had NO idea how i was gonna pack all these presents away into my backpack... It was ridiculous! Everyone made so much effort... Even got loads of cards and gifts from people at home, who shouldn’t even be thinking about me. I was just sitting there, slightly dazed and confused, and the presents kept coming and coming, and i didn’t even know what the hell was going on. Then, Natalie pulled our laptop, and played a PowerPoint presentation... OMG... She somehow messaged a load of friends from back home, to send photos of them holding “Happy Birthday Robbie G” signs, and video messages to me. Was emotional... So tight... But i was still too hungover and in too much in shock to react much. Like i said on Facebook – my friends ROCK! After all the present opening, Dacky puked in the toilet (classic dack), then we all headed out to Tanah Lot temple. Was really cool... Super chill... Our first cultural thing since arriving, really. We were a bit rushed, but then we drove to Seminyak for a couple drinks, and a meal on the beach J So tight, and super chill... Good way to end your birthday, right? The ribs i had almost made me JIZZ, OMG! The atmosphere was cool, mellow music. So chill. As we sat coloured bean bags, and under coloured umbrellas... Then the sunset... Sex... So tight... My dad even covered the meal for us... And I’m well and truly in my 30s... blurrhh

 

Aug 6^th

Believe it or not, i didn’t get absolutely waste stained on my actual birthday. So i was fresh as a daisy to have a productive day. We got up, and made our way to some tour company to book our elephant rides for the 8^th J We negotiated a price a couple days before in USD, and when we got there, he did his own little cash converter of what he thought it should cost in Rupiah. I found this a bit suspicious, but everyone just agreed and we booked it. The guy there was purposely testing Cat and confusing her as a joke. He was like “So we’re booking for 8 people, yes?” “On 10^th August, yes?” Cat was saying yes to everything, and he was just laughing. She then took my bank card and asked in front of everyone “WHATS YOUR PIN NUMBER AGAIN, ROB!?”.... There was like 4 locals in the room, a couple outside, and she was just about to walk down a tiny alleyway with nearly $200... Shmose...

We booked up, then got a taxi to Ubud... Just me, Cat, my mum, and my dad. I wanted to take a day trip there, as it was a more cultural part of Bali... You know how cultured i am blog fans ;) On the way there we stopped off at some clothes making place, then a traditional jewellery making place, then to a tea and coffee plantation. We had about 12 different teas and coffees lined up, including this coffee thats been shitted out by a mongoose... literally... They have a bunch of mongooses sitting in cages, just shitting out coffee beans all day for extra flavour :/ What a life... My dad didn’t enjoy the tastings much. He was scoring them all like “2, 1, 2, 0” out of 10... Even on the really nice ones - me, mum and Cat were like “9, 8, 10...” then my dad “ermm... 0?...” Psst. He did try some of the local alcohol though... Arak. I moved past that shit and went straight to the chocolate. When we left, Cat gave the girl who poured the drinks a massive tip. I said “We cant keep tipping, we’re still backpackers” She was like “Its nearly her birthday” ...It was in October blog fans... We finally got to Ubud, but we were rushing as we were a bit late. We visited the Monkey Forest, which i could of spent a whole day in, but we only had about an hour there. Mark told me some of the monkeys carried rabies, and he would never go near them. But they only seemed interested in jacking you. Not biting you... Luckily for me, I got photos of monkeys on my arms, and head, without getting robbed at all... We’re frriennddss ;) We managed to see a bit of the Ubud town centre, shops, and palace, and then we went home. Definitely liked Ubud a lot though. Some of the architecture, temples, surrounding rice fields were amazing... Felt i needed a lot more time than i had...

 

Aug 7^th

Cat decided she was going to go to Ubud again with Rachel. I was really tempted to, but i felt i should spend more time with Mark, Dacky, and my parents. So we basically chilled balls by the pool with them. It was a month since Marks birthday, which i wasn’t at home for, so we decided to have a month late celebration... It was just an excuse to get drunk really. We thought we’d have a “boys night” and “girls night” separate to make it interesting. Originally we thought we were gonna go into Seminyak to see “midget boxing”. But we got told all the midgets went on holiday... Thats a bit weird... I had the vision of 26 midgets, sitting round a hotel, somewhere exotic, sipping cocktails, doing flips into the pool... Why would ALL the midget boxers take a holiday on the same day? Makes it seem like some weird lollipop guild, cult thing or something... Anyway, that failed - and according to my research, all the other clubs and bars in Seminyak were gay bars... That wasn’t the “boys night” we had in mind. So we stayed in Kuta... We were playing this game all day where we couldn’t say any quotes from the movie “Hot Rod”. Every time we did, we tallied up shots for predrinks. By the time we started drinking: Nats owed 1 shot, Dacky owed 2 shots, me 3, and Mark 4. We also played ‘Drinking Jenger’, which i got for my birthday. By the end of predrinks, some of us had done over 10 shots, downed several cups, and we were all pretty wasted. So much so – girls night failed, and boys night failed... Dont think any of us were in the mood or state to mingle with others, and we would of had a better night together... So, nothing much happened that night. But i did end the night sleeping next to the toilet, on the cold bathroom floor... Chundering EVERYWAHH... J ...tight...

 

Aug 8^th

ELEPHANT DAY! :D Was all pretty hanging. Some worse than others, but we all managed to get our arses into gear to see the Elephant Safari Park. The drive there was SO LONG! We were all hungover, tired, and hungry. And you cant sleep in taxis on these Bali roads. Shits cray... When we finally got there, we all kinda powerwalked past the elephants and straight to the buffet lunch. Yum! After we satisfied our hunger, we managed to catch a elephant show. Saw all of them doing tricks, slam-dunking basketballs, scoring penalties, and doing maths... Mad skills!... They all looked SO HAPPY! :D We then had a really cool 30min ride on them, and got our photos taken... My favourite bit was at the end though. When they all were able to play together in a big pond there. Was funny to see them run around and splash water at each other. Was super badass... My parents really liked it too, and we bought some photos J ...So tight...

 

Aug 9^th

Spent another day lazing around the pool, backing up photos, and starting to pack for our last day L REALLY didn’t wanna say bye to my friends and parents, and go back to Australia. Starting in a new town, job hunting, back at stage one... didn’t seem appealing. But this was my last full day with everyone. I thought it would be special if we got a cab to the south of Bali to Uluwatu. Its a place where they have a temple on a cliff edge, and it looks really nice at sunset. They also do a show, and traditional fire dance called the Kecak... It wasn’t REALLY a dance, but the day there was a nice ending to the trip anyway. The temple and sunset was really nice... My fave part was probably when a monkey stole Natalies glasses off her head though... SHMOSEY...

We all went back, and wanted a last night out with each other. But we started predrinking late... We were about to head out at 1am, but then it started pissing down with rain. We were all pretty tired though, and we had a good time chatting and laughing together in our rooms.

 

Aug 10^th

My leaving day! L Got up early to pack and check out of Hotel Suris. Had so many presents and new things, but a lot of it i was sending back home... We said bye to Rachel and Shona, then went with Cat to say bye to my parents. Bad times... The other 4 went to a hotel in Sanur, as they were getting picked up from there to go to Gili the next day. Me and Cat were going to stop there after i saw my parents, to say bye to them before we went to the airport. Anyway, we went to my parents place, and spent my last couple hours with them... Thats when there was a bit of a GAME CHANGER blog fans... I said to my dad “Ive been thinking... We’re going back to Darwin, to an expensive hostel. We don’t get our new apartment until next week.. Darwin is bloody expensive! And all we’ll be doing is job hunting. So, why not pay to change our flights, get a boat, and just stay with our friends and go to Gili Islands!?” YOLO right?? EVERYONE raves on about how good Gili is, and ill also get the chance to see Ubud a bit more. Darwin is so expensive, and Bali is so cheap. I probably wouldn’t spend that much more, to cancel flights, and continue this trip here. Then, when we do go back to Darwin, we can move straight into our new apartment, and get on this job hunting ting serious. So that what we did! :D It was a bit of a headache to sort out. And we were discussing it as my parents were leaving. But my dad said “You left home to travel and have fun. So do it”... Excellent choice... I said bye to my parents, and it was a bit sad... Our time together flew by so quick. We looked forward to it for months, then it was gone in days. But we did have a really good time together, and it was good to see them. Was sad to wave goodbye to them as they turned the corner in their taxi...

I couldn’t dwell on it though. Cat and I had to buck our ideas up, and book this boat and change our flight... After a few hours of stress, payments, and phone calls, it was confirmed! We were coming to Gili with our friends! We messaged Mark and Dacky to tell them, but it was a surprise to Nats and Char when we turned up in Sanur J Spontaneous wins!

 

Aug 11^th

Woke up early to get the shuttle bus to the harbour. It felt like real travelling again. Bumpy roads, crowded buses, 600 backpacks, and a dodgy stomach.. So much farting blog fans... So much farting... The harbour was a bit busy and disorganised, but we got on the boat OK. Had one of the best views you could ever have whilst weeing there. Was emotional... Super chill... The sea instantly looked more tropical than it did in the rest of Bali, and the surrounding islands looked beautiful. Kind of what i imagined parts of Vietnam or Thailand would look like... We arrived in Gili Trawangan, without accommodation arranged. Which was a risk... Cat and I walked down the hot dusty roads to Marks, Dackys, Nats, and Charlottes place... They didn’t have space. But this is where our PLAN B kicked in! Little did the others know, Shona and Rachel were ALSO in Gili with us! :D We found out that when they were in the airport in Bali, they just had a total game changer, didn’t board their plane to Singapore... Just decided, “F*ck it, lets go Gili too!” So we were ALL here together! J Sooo, whilst we were trying to check in at others hotel, I messaged Rachel to see where her and Sho were staying. Rachel told me Nats had just bumped into her on the beach. SURPRISE!! ..Again! ... Cat and I checked into Rachels and Shonas place, and we were all here together J 4 in one hotel, 4 in another... Best... That day we mostly chilled by the beach. The ratio between boys and girls was amazing. So tight... Rachel and Shona got day time drunk, and me, Mark and Dacky tried swimming in the sea. But it was full of really REALLY sharp rocks, that just completely raped our feet. So that didn’t last long... We went out for a few drinks at night. After my first few drinks i was already feeling drunk, which was cool... But then, every other drink seemed to make me more sober... Which was not cool... Was still a decent night though... DEFINITELY made the right decision... J

 

 

Aug 12^th

Today we splashed our cash on a 5hr snorkel trip.. It set us back a MASSIVE $8... guess it was worth it ;) We saw a shipwreck, turtles, lots of fish, and Shona puke. Several times actually... She wernt in the best shape from the night before, so she spent all day feeding the fish her vom J Classic Shmose... When we got back, me and Mark had a nap on the beach, then we all started drinking again. It was an alright night. Started bar hopping, then we went to an empty beach to rave up. There was no music, alcohol, or people, but I was drunk enough to get on stage and pretend I was a DJ to the best beach party of all time... Parties without music and alcohol aren’t too fun though, so we went to another bar or 2. Ended up getting a few beers from a shop, then chilled on the beach again... I fell asleep with beer in hand... Nice... J

 

Aug 13^th

Woke up at a weird angle as my bed leg was broken. Wish I could tell you this happened in an interesting way, but I slept alone, and I don’t remember going to bed. So who knows... Didnt do much in the day. Ordered lunch at about 11:30, and it didn’t come out til about 12:30. Indonesian service seems so sllooww sometimes. But luckily i was in a super chill mood. In the evening the whole gang did a walk to the island view point. Was a moderate walk, but my balls had been chaffing a lot lately... And with the sweat and rubbing, and itching, it felt they were gonna bleed to DEATH! But i got through it... The views were decent, but it didn’t compare to the sunset we got at dinner time. Had really good food, amazing sunset, fire dancers, and everyone together... it was so tight.....

 

Aug 14^th

Today was the day we all left GIli to Ubud. And when we actually, officially, said bye to Shona and Rachel... Again... For real... Me and Cat got a boat over to Bali, then a bus to a hotel that Dacky, Mark, Nats and Char had booked up. Ubuds traffic is pretty mad, so we had to walk a fair bit with all our bags and shit. It wouldn’t of been so bad if the concrete was level, it wasn’t sweltering hot, and i wasn’t wearing black jean shorts. Was a rookie mistake. The chaffing was getting worse, and it felt like my balls were gonna drop off with every step i took... NOT so chill... Got to the hotel, and was not expecting any rooms available, as we checked it... online... BUT, luckily there was one room available J NICE... It looked like a bloody palace or temple! We paid a little more than the others, but we had air-con, it was bigger, and, well... It was a temple... We ate out at a restaurant that over looked a rice field... NICE! ... We then had a shisha, got monged, and went to bed J ...Super chill...

 

Aug 15^th

Had breakfast in the morning, and waited for everyone in the hotel restaurant. Everyone was there, but Dacky. Mark informed us that he might of had food poisoning, and he had been up all night shitting... I found this kinda funny, as me and Mark were talking about the weird lay-out of his and Dackys room the day before. They kinda had an open planned bathroom. So any noises or smells Dacky made, Mark would of experienced too :p But apparently it wasn’t too bad, and Dacky was mostly pooing water at this point J So, Dacky stayed in bed whilst we all went to the Monkey Forest. Mark was still pretty scared about going. He said the monkeys would probably bite us and give us rabies... We had a good time, fed the monkeys, let them climb on us, one stole my toothpicks - Super chill... THEN Marks nightmare happened... But to someone else... Cat and Charlotte bought some bananas to feed the monkeys with. I stood there with my camera, ready for some badass photos... They both got jacked for their bananas within about... 6 seconds... THEN one monkey (a pretty big one) was eyeing up me, Nats and Charlotte... He then locked eyes with Char, and grabbed her... We just kinda laughed. But the monkey didn’t let go. Then he opened his mouth and tired to sink his teeth into Charlottes ankle. His teeth were BIG. I feebly tried stamping at it, then a woman with a stick fended it off. Then Charlotte was out off the Monkey Forest in a flash! Within about... 6 seconds?... She now hates monkeys, Haha. We took it a bit easier after that. Had a nice walk around rice fields and stuff... Went to a bar called “LOL”. It was a right “laugh” blog fans ;) We then went to a shisha bar with live reggae. Nats and Char tried sneaking in a bottle of their gin, and mixed it with tonic water. Charlotte got caught, and her drink, and gin bottle was taken away... Was totally GINnconvenient day for her ;) Shmose...

 

Aug 16^th

LAST DAY IN BALI – Booo L We were all packed and ready to leave Ubud. Ready to head back to Kuta for our last hours together. Dacky left his room for the first time since his “incident”. We made a diversion to the Tegallalang rice fields. They were really picturesque, and super chill... But poor Dacky was struggling big time. We walked down all the terraced levels, then back up. Dacky took a break about every... 6 seconds... He looked like he was dying, but it was pretty funny :p When we got back to Kuta, we checked in to our old hotel, Suris. Mark and I got a McDonalds, then swam in the pool for a bit. Then we all went to SkyGarden, for our last $5 all you can eat buffet with free beer. Even that couldn’t get Dacky to come with us... I ate way too much again, then came back with Mark to say bye to him and Dack before they got a cab to the airport... Was not so chill L The goodbyes happened pretty quick, but ill def miss them two a lot in the next few months.... After that, It was just me, Cat, Nats and Char left. Nats and Char were staying the night in Suris as their flights were the next day. Char was going back to Thailand, and Nats back home to England. Was sad for us to say bye to them too. Seems weird that Nats is going home, as shes either been with us, or near to us for over a year now. So to see her going home, reunited with family etc will be a strange feeling. It feels like shes continuing in surrounding countries like Shona, Rachel and Charlotte are. We have some loose plans to meet up with others in Asia when we leave Oz. We’ll just have to see how that pans out... Anyway, as Cat and I got in the cab, Nats and Char waved us off... Nats then walked off teary eyed and tripped on the curb. Reminded us what a total sshhmose she is :p Psst Natalie...

 

Summary:

 

...Thats it! All good things come to an end ay :/ Holidays been sooo tight! Was awesome to see our friends, and my family... Awesome time, awesome birthday. Awesomely spoilt, by awesome people.... Awesome as shit! This could be a time where homesickness could kick in quite a bit. To come backwards, back to Oz, saying bye to my parents, and some of my closest friends. Then job hunting in a new place, quiet town, knowing no one, and nothing... It might feel a bit sucky at first... Not so chill... But you know what they say blog fans... “Whatever sucks knobs... Is GREAT for writing blogs!” J

 

So!... Stay tuned to what happens next!
For better or worse...

Until then, keep your shorts TIIIIIIGHT!!
(So tight)

Tarima Kashi, Bali J

Peace out to all my Rabbits....
Love you....

Zoooooooooooooooooooooooooooopyloooooo!!

x